6 mental health tips on how to prepare for getting pregnant

How to prepare for getting pregnant

You’re ready. Whether you’ve spent years getting to this point or you and your partner finally came to a decision, you want to have a baby. And that’s how we always say it, right? I want to have a baby. But this glosses over the next step, which isn’t always easy for everyone: trying to conceive. (TTC)

For some, getting pregnant happens quickly. So, how do you prepare for trying to get pregnant? While it’s important to be mindful of your physical health when trying to conceive, it’s equally important to give a little love to your mental and emotional health, too. Let's go over a few mental health tips on how to prepare for pregnancy. 

Getting started: How to prepare for getting pregnant

 How long will it take to get pregnant? According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG), for healthy couples in their 20s and early 30s, one in four women will get pregnant in any given menstrual cycle.¹ By age 40, that number drops to one in 10.²  If you’re under the age of 35, ACOG also states that ob-gyn doctors recommend trying to conceive for one year before investigating potential infertility problems.² If you’re older than 35, that evaluation is brought forward to six months.² And if you’re older than 40, it’s recommended you speak to your healthcare professional now.²
 

At first glance, this may seem discouraging. Take a deep breath and try a new perspective: Look at trying to conceive as the hopeful beginning of a year-long journey. Each month is a new chapter, and sometimes the longest books come with the sweetest endings.

Why emotional preparation matters for TTC

Like any life change, trying to get pregnant can bring on a range of emotions. An optimistic outlook can have a positive effect on your journey to pregnancy. In fact, stress is a potential cause of infertility and can affect your cycle and ovulation³ (more on that below). A positive mindset can be powerful, so here are six ways to focus on self-care as you prepare for pregnancy:

1. Understand your cycle and fertility window

Your menstrual cycle is more than your period. Understanding what happens throughout the month is key, and these diagrams can help. Pay special attention to information about ovulation, when a surge in hormones causes the release of a mature egg from the ovary. While an egg only survives for up to 24 hours, sperm can survive in a sperm-friendly environment for up to five days. So, the fertile window in which a woman can get pregnant or conception can occur is about six days. 

Tracking your fertile window can improve your chances of getting pregnant, and help adjust your expectations on timing. 

2. Talk to your healthcare professional

Be upfront about any personal physical or mental health risks you’re concerned about so your doctor can help you make a game plan. Here are a few questions to ask before TTC: 

• Will any of my current medications affect my chances of getting pregnant
• Do I need any tests or updated vaccines before trying to conceive?
• Are there any concerns that would require me to get genetic counseling?
• Are there any lifestyle changes I should make (exercising , weight gain or loss, substance use)?
• How does my partner’s health affect our chances of getting pregnant?

Updating your healthcare professional on your TTC journey can help navigate any uncertainties, roadblocks or questions that come up along the way.

3. Balance TTC with the rest of your life

You might be eager to dive into library books, podcasts, classes and more all dedicated to parenthood. There’s nothing wrong with being prepared, but make sure it doesn’t backfire. “Obsessing” over getting pregnant can potentially raise your stress levels. Try a fun hobby, go out to a new restaurant, say “yes” to something unexpected. By expanding your world outside of all things conception, you’ll find a balance beneficial to your well-being. 

4. Practice self-care healthy routines 

Physical health goes hand in hand with mental health, and both are important in prioritizing your fertility. Here are a few ideas to incorporate into your life:
✅ Eat nutritious foods and drink plenty of water, but don’t forget to treat yourself!
✅ Prioritize eight hours of sleep. 
✅ Move your body daily, whether it’s a walk or at-home yoga session.
✅ Find peace in meditation, a nap or a warm bath.
✅ Take frequent breaks from the noise of social media and opinion-heavy forums.
✅ Allow yourself to feel and process your emotions — sadness, anxiety, joy, confusion, anger, resentment— without judgment.
✅ Create and maintain boundaries, and communicate your needs to your loved ones.
✅ Be kind to yourself (this one is the most important).

5. Make it fun

It’s easy for sex to seem like a chore when you’re preparing to get pregnant. To up the romance factor when sex is scheduled, you may need to spice things up a bit. Go on an old-fashioned date beforehand, buy some lingerie, change the setting, light candles, play some music or try something new. Putting your partner in charge of this is a good and easy way for them to actively help you on this sometimes bumpy journey.

If the fun ever feels forced, it’s okay to take a step back. Make space to communicate with your partner and spend quality time together outside of sex or trying to conceive. You’ll both benefit from an intentional break.

6. Create a community of support

Even though countless other women have walked through infertility, trying to get pregnant can often feel isolating. And even with a loving and supportive partner, sharing your experience and emotions with others who have been there can be powerful. So how do you find a support network ? 

Opening up to a close friend or family member is a great place to start. If that feels too close to home, consider finding a community group online or in person. Many hospital systems have support groups for those experiencing infertility, or similar groups exist on a national level — like RESOLVE. If you’re not ready to share your journey, consider journaling. Sometimes the simple act of writing out your feelings and frustrations is just as helpful as saying them out loud to a friend.

When to seek professional mental health support

Starting a family is already a huge life change, and struggles with infertility can deepen symptoms of depression and anxiety.⁴ If you’re experiencing feelings of worthlessness, social isolation, loss of interest in your usual activities or extreme change in moods, seeking therapy can help you and your partner navigate these challenges. Additional help during important transitions is perfectly normal; don’t let stigmas or shame keep you from moving forward. 

Stay in-the-know with the Clearblue® blog

Looking for insights on your health journey? Clearblue® sends you curated, science-backed articles right to your inbox.

As you embark on this emotion-packed journey, the path may not always be smooth. But there is so much potential for joy ahead, and the creation of a love unlike anything you have ever known. You’re ready.

Related Articles

• 6 ways to manage stress if you feel like you're "obsessing" over getting pregnant
• Does stress affect your chances of getting pregnant?
• How to boost fertility health: Steps that may help.
• How to prepare your body for pregnancy: 12 tips and the science behind them
• Getting in the mood when trying to conceive: How to keep it fun and exciting